Do-Overs!
It's been quite some time since I've shared anything with all of you! I wanted to update you and let you know I will be posting regularly again, so thank you for your patience!
I originally had invited you to join me on this journey towards regaining my health through a ketogenic way of eating. To me, this means every part of the journey—both good and not-so-good! Shortly after my last post I had to be hospitalized several times throughout that year due to atrial fibrillation (AFIB) attacks. Each hospital visit really through me off track with my eating, because they just do NOT understand what "healthy" really means for those of us with diabetes/insulin resistance! I got tired of fighting them and ate what I was given—only to find myself craving all the "crappy carbage" again! This began "the struggle" all over again to get back to the way of eating that had done so much for my health and weight…
The Struggle
I fought very hard to get back on track and would succeed-fail-succeed-fail over and over again! It became very disheartening, but I never gave up and always knew this was the right way to eat for my body—I was just having a hard time finding the strength to remain consistent with it…
The following year was very trying… Early in the year we had some—shall we say—"family issues"(!) that caused a lot of stress. Then in March, my sister passed away unexpectedly after a horrible motorcycle accident not long after we celebrated her 50th birthday. It was devastating, to say the least. It was a long ordeal because she'd lived in another city and was in a coma for a while, so there was a lot of travel back and forth to check on her. (Several years ago I created a web page on my other site called "Comfort for Those Who Mourn" – If you are dealing with mourning, please see: Comfort for Those Who Mourn.)
If that weren't enough, around the same time all this was going on, I started having very severe, constant headaches, along with ringing in the ears, double vision, severe muscle spasms in my shoulders, and many other strange and scary symptoms. I went through months of seeing various doctors, going to the Emergency Room, having injections, etc. It was excruciating, and I thought it would never end…
Because of all that was going on in my life, I resorted back to my old way of eating from time to time—always returning to keto, but never able to sustain it for long without giving in again. So I ended up regaining quite a bit of my weight back, which only added to my frustration and discomfort. I wanted to be honest with all of you, because I know that I'm not the only one who struggles with emotional eating! So I wanted to let everyone know honestly what has been going on and let you know it's okay if you struggle, and that you can find your way out, too!
The Do-Over!
At the beginning of this year (2019)—cliché as it may be(!)—I resolved that THIS was my year to recommit myself to keto and all the health benefits it brings! As I found my way back, I found renewed hope and strength! Just that real, honest, firm DECISION was the beginning!
I felt SO awful and guilty about how badly I'd "messed up" after I'd done so well prior to this relapse. But I realized that kicking myself over and over would get me nowhere (except probably even MORE stuck and going the wrong direction). I asked a very dear friend if I could just "call a do-over" for last year since it was so awful! He assured me that YES I could! This perspective somehow helped me just forgive myself and push that "reset button" and simply START AGAIN! I don't say I started OVER because I wasn't starting from the very beginning but only where I'd left off before I was derailed!
With my new-found HOPE, I moved FORWARD, quit looking BACKWARD, and found myself 100% committed again! I was FINALLY able to be consistent again with "real keto" and not slipping every few days like before! The first change that happened (just like it did when I originally began low carb back in 2013) was my blood sugar quickly came back into the normal range with WAY less insulin. I'd had to increase my insulin again just to keep my sugar under control during the whole previous year, which of course made the weight gain even worse! So being able to reduce the insulin again was very encouraging and gave me the motivation to KEEP GOING!
The next thing that happened is the weight started falling off again! I had regained 60 of the 100 lbs. I'd lost. Within one month of restarting, 20 lbs. had come back off! And within another month or so, 37 had come back off! I have NEVER before felt SO determined, so COMMITTED, so CONVINCED that this is the ONLY way my body responds! I can honestly say I have not "messed up" even 1 bite since my restart! I didn't do THIS well originally! So I know I'm back on the right track and feeling great about it all now!! I want to encourage all of you—especially to anyone else who is struggling or has slipped backwards—to NEVER GIVE UP! Do-overs are totally possible!!
So that's my current situation! My journey continues, and I WILL reach my goals—no matter how long it takes or how hard the struggle!
